I am a #powergirl love to work out. However, I have been frustrated more than once with my progress. After working out five days a week for years I couldn’t get through 30 min of cardio without taking a break. I was actually regressing. My diet wasn’t bad. I didn’t understand why I felt so terrible all the time. After many doctor visits I ended up getting blood infusions for severe anemia. After not being able to jog for more than eight minutes I could run 3 miles. I am thankful it wasn’t something more serious. I’ve been doing 2.5 miles lately and will need to have my next round of infusions within the year. I have to learn to come to terms with my limitations and not be so hard on myself. Everyone’s journey is different. Thank you to @blogilates@popflex_active@movewithkeairalashae@fitnessblender and @thefitnessmarshall for helping me navigate my own journey. And these are some goofy stretching pics. 😋
#IAmAPowerGirl because I found my strength in lifting other people up.
My story is not unique, but it’s something that I rarely discuss out of shame. Since elementary school, I have always felt insecure about my body and appearance and incessantly compared myself to people around me who I perceived as more beautiful and therefore more valued. Furthermore, I thought that insecurity was equivalent to vanity.
It came to a head my sophomore year of high school when I started to discover the perils of the internet. Unfortunately, I stumbled across “thinspiration” posts before the body positive posts. I fell into a hole of seeing women who seemed to have perfect bodies and perfect lives and berated myself for not looking like a model. When I looked in the mirror, I didn’t see myself, rather an exaggerated image of all my perceived flaws. I started obsessively working out late at night instead of sleeping, and felt guilty for eating (even though I’d pass out at track practice if I didn’t.) I hated myself every time I passed by a reflective surface, fixating on every imperfection. I even stopped valuing the substantive parts of myself. I thought, what was the point of achieving in school and doing sports if I could never be beautiful?
Ultimately, I learned to appreciate my body and appearance as it was by realizing how I could perceive beauty in people around me. I admired details of how beautiful my friends were, and most of all how they carried themselves with confidence even though deep down they were dealing with their own insecurities. I realized that if I could recognize beauty in others, why couldn’t I realize it in myself? I started to appreciate my body for its strength and resilience rather than comparing it to a mold of beauty. Four years later, I still have some insecurities, but I don’t let them control me. It was so refreshing and eye-opening to hear Cassey talk about her own struggles with body image. I am so lucky to have her as a role model, and friends who lift me up, and I derive my confidence by appreciating the strength and beauty of other boss ladies in my life and realizing that someone sees the same in me.