Due to unforeseen circumstances (aka me getting sick as a dog and not functioning), my Mental Health Monday series will start next week.
Anxiety is the first area I’m going to touch on. The cartoon above does a good job of depicting anxiety in a humorous way. Thoughts like those are constantly on a loop in my head. “What if I don’t finish this project good enough?” “What if they don’t like me?” “What if they think I’m a terrible speaker?” “What if the plane crashes?” ... You get the drift.
I’ve been told many times to, “Just get over it.” Like this is something I can flip on and off with a switch. Because people don’t understand what anxiety is, how it works, or what it’s like to live with it, it’s easy to assume those of us who do struggle should just be able to make it go away. It’s a lot more complex than that, which I’ll delve into on the blog.
Do you live with anxiety?
2,33011519 February, 2019
It's not easy being human. No matter how many tools, and strategies, and self help books we acquire, it does not eliminate our experience of suffering. Those things can sometimes help us to feel more safe and comfortable when we're feeling overwhelmed. But the truth is, we still don't get to escape the very real and raw experience of what it means to be human in a sometimes very painful, confusing, and isolating world.
Even as a therapist, I don't get to escape this. In fact, as a therapist I'm often pretty hard on myself and expect that I should just be fine all the time. I have to give myself constant reminders that I'm also only human and have my own fare share of flaws and vulnerabilities and tender parts.
So, in case you're having one of those days yourself, I just wanted to speak up and let you all know that there are days when we feel we can't seem to do anything to feel better, to "manage" our feelings, or to even be "mindful" enough. And that's totally okay. We can't do this growth thing 100% all the time. Healing is far from perfect, it's meant to be messy. And being in our own mess often brings us the deepest clarity.
2,81114420 February, 2019
👆You cannot tell if someone is “healthy” just by looking at them
We live in a culture that overemphasizes physical health. Everyday we are bombarded with messages on the way our bodies “should” look, the kale we need to be eating, and the calories we need to be burning. 🤦♀️
On the other hand, we stigmatize conversations about mental/emotional health and ignore the role stress, relationships, and our environment play on our wellbeing. Completely missing what’s below the surface. 🙅♀️
So, I refuse to accept diet culture’s definition of “healthy”. A definition which emphasizes a thin ideal and condemns larger bodies. A definition which focuses on the superficial, the symptoms, rather than the root cause. A definition that causes more problems than solutions and is detrimental to the health of our society.
My definition of health, you probably know it by now...holistic! Diet and exercise are great, don’t get me wrong, but it’s just one part of the puzzle. It’s like throwing on a fresh coat of paint on a car with a broken engine...pretty, but completely useless!
Name one healthy thing you do-completely unrelated to diet/exercise.
90310519 February, 2019
Exhale. Writing this post brought up so much for me. It still does. I don't know if there is truly ever a point in our life where we ever feel *fully* enough. I think that's more the norm that most of us talk about.
Becoming enough is such a unique and sensitive process that get's infiltrated by so many of our experiences - what others have told us about ourselves, how the world has treated us, and most importantly, what we have internalized from all of those things. There is such a universal wound at the centre of all human experience, and that is the wound of not being enough.
It was super hard for me to talk about this in my own therapy. Tears would always well up, sometimes sobbing. It's a topic that touches so deeply in my core. It's taken me a long time to be able to move through these different layers in the image above - and often times I feel I move back and forth between them.
But what if I told you that you are enough simply by being here? I know it's hard to believe sometimes, but what if that could be true? What if your worth is beaming out all around you, and it's just a matter of time before you see its radiance? I hold that possibility in my mind and heart, for myself, and all of us 💗
👆Affirmations...yayyy or nay?
Affirmations sometimes get a bad rep...many feel they are totally disconnected from reality.
BUT I’m wondering if maybe the problem with affirmations isn’t the affirmations themselves...but the lack of relatability.
I mean, I couldn’t possibly say to myself “I love my body” It would come off as unauthentic, forced, removed from my reality. On the other hand, I could say “More body kindness, less body judgement” That is my reality and something I can definitely get behind.
So, let’s make affirmations about us...about what works for us, individually. Let’s make them relatable and truthful! ❓
What are some relatable affirmations you can think of? Please share them below, would love to get a good list going! ❤️
Verwachten🤷🏻♀️ Wat zeg je tegen mensen die vragen "gaat het al beter?" Want nee het gaat niet beter, zelfs slechter
Soms heb ik het gevoel dat ik moet voldoen aan verwachtingen. In mijn nieuwste blog schrijf ik erover
Link in bio 👩🏻💻📱
It’s alright to not know what to say to someone going through difficulties.
Sometimes, they just need to feel supported energetically.
Being present, hugs, hand holding, back rubbing, food prep, a letter with all the things you appreciate about them, reminiscing about a good shared memory, these are few of many loving ways to support someone especially energy wise. #UnKutMentalHealthKE
I often hear a reluctance from people to support their loved ones (including to support me) because they “don’t know how to help”. Of course, friends and family should not be expected to provide support at the same level or in replacement of a qualified mental health professional.
But support people are hugely important in managing any kind of mental illness, and we deserve for our support people to understand how they can help. I know that there is fear around doing or saying the wrong thing, but if you do the research to understand what is and isn’t helpful, very few things you do or say would be worse than doing nothing.
If you’re willing to do the work, there are plenty of resources out there for the loved ones of people living with mental illness (included below - and if you know of any other resources please comment!). If you want to help, but don’t know how, do your research.
General information for friends/relatives/carers
Information for friends/relatives/carers of people affected by:
Sonnige Tage, blauer Hinmel und eine Schlittelpiste - was will ich mehr?🤓
Im heutigen Artikel auf dervolpe.ch (Link in Bio) zeige ich die komische Wechselwirkung von Sonnentagen und der Depression auf.
Geniesst die Lektüre!
Ich geniesse in der Zwischenzeit die Sonne ☀️
➡️ Folge @der.volpe Blog über Depressionen und das bunte Leben
12147 minutes ago
eF aR I E eN De eS do you really need them? YES (well if it’s these two)
18248 minutes ago
You will be surprised how taking action will change things. If you need a bit of support, don’t hesitate to get in touch. #heretohelp
#INTENTIONS aka kick up the butts 🍑 What's your current intention/s? Big or small? I'd like to know! Mine are at the end of this post 🤗
I like this technique because it's measurable and non-intimidating. It can be used by anyone, no matter where in life you are. Even if you're at the darkest depths of a depression, you can still set small intentions for each day to build yourself up and feel amazing.
The first thing to work out is what's your learning style? I definitely like writing things down, and I'm experimenting with saying things outloud...but this can be uncomfortable and harder to grasp. Some people need pictures and vision boards. You do you 😉
So my intentions change and adapt all the time as they should, depending where I'm at, but this past week mine have gone like this: 🧘♀️Practise yoga daily
🍉Eat 3 decent meals a day
😇Set and maintain my personal boundaries i.e when it comes to alcohol/partying (no more than 2 drinks on a night out)
🧠Get 30 mins a day of work on Brain Gains or neurology studies done
💨Breathe through feelings of self-doubt when they pop up
A relationship between an animal and a human is an amazing thing. A famous poet once said, “Until one has loved an animal, a part of one’s soul remains unawakened”. Do you wonder why that is? Or do you have a pet and you know exactly why that is? Is it because of the undivided love they show for you, because of the loyalty and the care they have for you, or because of the overwhelming joy and happiness they bring to your home?
There are many reasons why animals and the relationships they have with us are amazing, but there’s something else about animals that is wonderful, and that’s the affect they have on our mental health.
When it comes to our mental health, there are lots of different ways and reasons we can suffer. It can be due to depression, bipolar disorder, post-traumatic stress disorder, schizophrenia… the list can go on. Living with a mental health illness can be one of the hardest things to handle in everyday life, so when it comes to the support a pet can give, it’s outstanding.
Studies have shown that pets are extremely helpful when it comes to recovering from severe mental health condition. A specific study was conducted and found that pets helped the participants involved to manage their emotions better, and that it even distracted them from the symptoms they experience that are caused by their mental health condition.
That wasn’t all of it though, around half of the people involved in this particular study said that having a pet helped them manage their illness and everyday life better, as well as giving them the feeling of being in control, and providing them with a sense of security and routine.
The study alone is enough evidence of how our pets can improve our mental health, but experiencing it yourself is a whole other thing, something that can change your life for the better.
To carry on reading this post click on the link in my bio & select: How Pets Improve Our Mental Health.
There’s so many different ways this can apply to our lives. Codeine however is ruling my mind right now, so despite the fact I want to write something meaningful, I’m not sure if what follows is going to even make much sense? 🤷♀️
Sometimes when I’m struggling the most with pain or other symptoms I’m aware that I can quickly become what I would say is not the best version of myself.
It’s tough when you’re struggling, and sometimes it can the better of us. That’s okay though, we’re allowed to be emotional, angry, moody, whatever the emotion comes out as.
The rest of the time though, you can be the best version of yourself, whether that be for your own sake, or for the people around you that you love.
You are not your illness, you are still a person behind it all, someone with dreams, opinions, and love.
So, be the best version of you ♥
2022 hours ago
#BackOff Negativity 🦶🏻
"Have you ever changed your goals because of the negative influence?" If yes, then who is loosing?
Of course, YOU!
To tackle the negativity you need train your mind to avoid the unnecessary, toxic, people and situations.
A lot of people even told me, you cannot be the example. Some of them helped me to achieve my goals.
And today, I'm helping others to be fit and fine.
ALWAYS FOCUS ON THE POSITIVES EVEN THOUGH ITS LITTLE, BEAT YOUR NEGETIVITY EVERY SINGLE MOMEMNT!
Hold on Tight .
Photo of me and some of my work mates goofing around, wearing our new @armoire.for.all sweatshirts ❤️
I wish I could time travel and tell my younger self that everything would be ok. That I would survive the hardships, and the heartaches. That I would heal properly and feel whole again. That I would feel alive after feeling dead. I would love again. Find peace, and balance. That I would make more friends. And my oldest ones still loved me. .
I wish I could give her a big hug and tell her she was strong, and would get stronger. That time would prove her most frightening doubts wrong. She would find happiness, and the pain would subside. That it might take five years, but slowly she would become whole again. That her foundation is solid, and good for building.
I would tell her that the future is bright. To just hold tight. And that I love her. .
To everyone who is in thick of their healing process. This message is also for you ❤️ #YouAreStrong
February Favorites ♡
I usually don't share things like this but I decided that if I'm going to share my illness and my life with you, I should be able to share fun things like this as well!
I love makeup and beauty and these are a few of the products I've been really loving this month. Do you guys use any of these? Are any of you as upset as I am that this Cherry lip scrub from Lush is limited edition 😥